User blog:The Not-As-Ultimate Shapeshifter/Random Satire: We GOTTA Get PIXIE Back
'We GOTTA Get PIXIE Back!!!!!!' Rough draft written by Helmetpig2013 Adapted by Charlie the Penguin Inspired by "We GOTTA Get SPONGEBOB Back" by UnkleJoe ---- Location: PSA HQ November 2013 Helmet: *sigh* It sure is boring around here now that Pixie’s gone… I gotta get Pixie back. I GOTTA GET PIXIE BACK!!! Helmet runs into the Everyday Phoning Facility Gary: Hi, can I get you anythin- *gets punched and knocked over by Helmet* Helmet: *pulls out a machine gun and points it at him* GIVE ME ALL THE MONEY IN THE CASH REGISTER Gary: DON’T DO THIS HELMET Helmet: But I GOTTA get PIXIE back!!! Gary: YOU KNOW THIS IS WRONG!! THIS WON’T BRING PIXIE BACK. also this is a phoning facility there is no cash register Helmet gasps and runs to the Cove, where he finds the miniature hospital. Megg, apparently now an ambulance driver is sitting in the driver’s seat of a conveniently-placed ambulance. Megg: I really like this thing’s color scheme, but I think it needs more stripes, you know what I’m sayi- *gets yanked out by Helmet, who then takes her place* AHHHH DONT TOUCH MY HOODIE ITS AN ANTIQUE Helmet drives away in the ambulance, running over Megg in the process, which causes everyone in the comments section to yell at Charlie for not liking her. Helmet: *pulls out megaphone and leans out of the window as he drives* PEOPLE OF CLUB PENGUIN, WE GOTTA GET- *crashes back into the PSA HQ* Helmet pulls out his machine gun and blows up the door to Pixie’s office, where Charlie is sitting, in the middle of a meeting with one of the agents who is ranting about how awful it is that he’s the vice director. Helmet picks up their chair and shoves it aside. Helmet: CHARLIE Charlie: Hey there Helmet, nice entrance! That wall only got repaired TWO FREAKING MINUTES AGO FROM YOUR LAST ONE. *eye twitches* :) Helmet: NEVERMIND THAT, WE GOTTA GET PIXIE BACK Charlie: Grrrrr, we GOTTA get PIXIE back. Helmet: We gotta go! Charlie: But HOW? Helmet: WE NEED SOME WEED Charlie: What about wheels? Helmet: *is smoking a weedle like he does everyday* THOSE TOO In Helmet’s igloo… Phone: PAIGE! PAIGE! PICK UP OR I’LL FEED PETE TO CHARLIE Paige: *picks up the phone* WELL HELLO THERE DEAR HUSBAND. Wanna talk about puffles? Helmet: WE GOTTA GET PIXIE BAAAAEEECKASOFDSFISJGDS *hangs up* Paige: WE GOTTA GET PIXIE BACK FASTER THAN PETE MOVES AFTER FIGURING OUT WHERE I PUT MY HIDDEN WOODEN STICK SUPPLY WHICH IS CURRENTLY BEHIND THE REFRIGERATOR IN THE KITCHE- oh @#$%. Pete: *zooms by at the speed of light* FEED ME PAPER Paige’s Rescue Off-Roader Car bursts out of the igloo and off of a cliff, where it lands in front of the PSA HQ, where Charlie and Helmet get in. The car then zooms to Pixie’s igloo, which no one apparently thought to look the entire time. Charlie: *throws self against the door* ITS FREAKING LOCKED UP WITH OVER 90000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 Helmet: LET’S GO ASK ROOKIE TO LET US IN Charlie: 00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 Paige: *breaks down the door to Rookie’s igloo with an axe* HEEEEER’ES PAIGIEEEEEEE Helmet: *shoves past her and runs into Rookie’s igloo* ROOKIE Rookie: I know, we gotta get Pixie back. Here is the key. *hands a piece of chocolate* Charlie: 00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 Everyone runs into Pixie’s igloo Helmet: *runs and breaks down the door to Pixie’s room* Pixie? There is a Pixie-shaped object under Pixie’s bed covers Helmet: Pixie?! Rookie: It’s not her Helmet: *pulls of sheet to reveal a small discarded bag of crack that doesn't resemble Pixie's shape at all* GAHH Charlie: Don’t worry Helmet, we’re right behind you. And by we I mean them, because I’m outta here. @#$% this @#$% brah *flies out the window* Helmet, Paige, and Rookie inhale the crack and are transported to Club Penguin in December 2014 Rookie: Uh, how come all the Christmas decorations are blue? Helmet: DA BA DEE DA BA DIE im sorry i just had to Charlie: *suddenly appears* I LAIK BLUE *sees Merry Walrus Party* #LolNope *disappears again* Paige: Wait a minute, I just realized… THIS IS THE HOLIDAY PARTY AND IT’S DAYTIME!!!! Rookie: NUUUUUUUUU Paige: AHHHHHHHHHH Rookie and Paige turn to dust like vampires and blow away Helmet: Wha- NO! NUUUUUUUUU!!!! I guess it's a good thing I don't play CP anymore... *suddenly notices a large shadow in the distance* Huh? Shadow is revealed to be a gigantic, monsterific-looking Pixie Pixie: HELMET, YOU FORGOT TO BRING ME MY CHOCOLATE *pulls out a piece of pie* Helmet: NOOOOOO *runs in opposite direction* Pixie: MAY THE ODDS FOREVER BE IN YOUR FAVOR AND KRAP *throws pie, which lands on Helmet, crushing him* UNLESS YOURE THAT GUY Helmet: AHHHHHHHHH OVER 900000000 HOURS LATER… Helmet: Well this stupid thing was worthless. I’ll just put it out there for the puffles to enjoy. *throws bag of crack out the window* Herbert: *catches* YES! SUCCESS! FINALLY THE PSA’S SECRETS TO HOW THEY FUNCTION ARE ALL MINE *inhales crack* …AHHHHHHHHH- *dies* Pixie: HEY EVERYONE IM BACK Helmet: Too late. *leaves and slams door behind him* :| Pixie: ...HOLY KRAP WHY IS CHARLIE ON THE WIKI BACKGROUND In other words, Pixie, please don’t leave us again. Category:Blog posts